Chicago Drivers

[PAKETA_1]

About Chicago drivers.

Ardith, who is from San Diego CA, always told me that the LA drivers are aggressive & mean. I think some of it has a lot to do w/ her driving (she changes lanes w/o looking, makes abrupt turns, etc), but I agree that most LA drivers are impatient.

So I thought LA drivers are probably the meanest next to NYC and Hong Kong or something. And I was pretty much ready to handle any road in the US.

Well, I didn't know Chicago drivers are insane & have their own set of rules. Couple rules I found out:

1) If the on-coming traffic doesn't start moving immediately after the light turns green, you can make a left-turn.

2) Signaling gets you nowhere. You must live up to the stereotype of crazy-Asian-female-driver and force your way into the next lane.

3) The first 5 seconds of the red light signal equals green light signal.

4) "Please go first" hand signal (waving hand to the side) can be mistaken for "F*** you."

[ALTEZZA]

biggrin.gif
1 i 3 redovno gi prilagam
pak za nomer 2, to ne triabva da e jena ili aziatka, ima gi tolkova mnogo otkachalki na patia. az za tova na magistralata kat barzam nikoga ne davam migachi, stoto kat dam i malkoto miasno det imam da vliaza s kolata vednaga mi go zapushvat, za tova napravo si vlizam, pak te horata vinagi se sestat i spirachki da natisnat zad men . btw, za takiva kat men se preporachva auto-diming(avtomatichno zatamniavane) na ogledalata za zadno vijdane, taka che kat ti pusnat dalgite svetlicni otzad da ne ti puka

[PAKETA_1]

oshte malko

1) Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Chicago has its own version of traffic rules..."Hold on and pray."

2) There is no such thing as a dangerous high-speed chase in Chicago. We all drive like that.

3) All directions start with, "I-94"... which has no beginning and no end.

4)The morning rush hour is from 6 to 10. The evening rush hour is from 3 to 7. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday evening.

5) If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, cussed out and possibly shot.

6) When you are the first one on the starting line, count to five when the light turns green before going to avoid crashing with all the drivers running the red light in cross-traffic.

7) If someone actually has their turn signal on, it is probably a factory defect.

8) All old ladies with blue hair and driving Mercedes have the right of way. Period.

9)The minimum acceptable speed on the Dan Ryan is 85. Anything less is considered downright sissy.

10)The Congress Expressway (Ike) is our daily version of NASCAR.


Driving in Chicago, there's no place like it!

[PAKETA_1]

eto i oshte malko - interesnoto e che tova sa neshta koito drugite shofiori pishat za nas i daje gi ima kato "travel Tips" za Chicago - za nas tova si e napalno normalno .

Eto kakvo kazva edin takav sait za turizam v Chicago
"Driving in Chicago is a challenge. The pace is speedy and reckless, and Chicago drivers have little patience for slow-driving tourists."

# A right lane construction closure is just a game to see how many people can cut in line by passing you on the right as you sit in the left lane waiting for the same jerks to squeeze their way back in before hitting construction barrels.

# Turn signals are just clues as to your next move in road battle, so never use them.

# Under no circumstances should you leave a safe distance between you and the car in front of you no matter how fast you're going. If you do, the space will be filled in by somebody else, putting you in an even more dangerous situation.

# The faster you drive through a red light, the smaller the chance you have of getting hit.

# Never get in the way of a car that needs extensive body work. (Remember no-fault insurance: he might not have much to lose; you do.)

# Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to insure that your anti-lock braking system kicks in to give you a nice relaxing foot massage as the brake pedal pulsates.

# Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right. It's a good way to scare people entering the highway.

# Speed limits are arbitrary figures to make our city look as if it conforms with other state policies; these are given only as suggestions and are readily unenforceable.

# Just because you're in the left lane and have no room to speed up or move over doesn't mean that a driver flashing his high beams behind you doesn't think he can go faster in your spot.
biggrin.gif biggrin.gif

[Japanese_fever]

biggrin.gif
1 i 3 redovno gi prilagam
pak za nomer 2, to ne triabva da e jena ili aziatka, ima gi tolkova mnogo otkachalki na patia. az za tova na magistralata kat barzam nikoga ne davam migachi, stoto kat dam i malkoto miasno det imam da vliaza s kolata vednaga mi go zapushvat, za tova napravo si vlizam, pak te horata vinagi se sestat i spirachki da natisnat zad men . btw, za takiva kat men se preporachva auto-diming(avtomatichno zatamniavane) na ogledalata za zadno vijdane, taka che kat ti pusnat dalgite svetlicni otzad da ne ti puka

Tova za migachite e verno, no az imam drugi nabliudeniq! laugh.gif
Karam v lqvata lenta, no iskam da se prestroq v dqsnata predi krustovi6te. I nqkoj rub ot krustovi6teto, koeto e s znak STOP si misli, 4e ste zavivam na dqsno i se opitva da trugva da presi4a. Ami az ve4e predi da podam miga4 gledam koje okolo men i dali ima smizul da podavam. 4e te tiq mogat vsi4ko da si pomislqt i vinagi gi gledam v o4ite, 6toto te mogat da gledat na lqvo a da zavivat nadqsno i obratno?!?
6te trqbva i az da otvikna s podavaneto na miga4, kogato trqbva i netrqbva!
1-vo i 3-to pravilo vajat s pulna sila za BG i za Europa po princip!
Az minavam na julto, no izbqgvam na 4erveno

Ami druga glupost nqkakva kola sedi v lqvata lenta i iz4akva da zaviva nalqvo i vsi4ki ovtze otzad 4akat vmesto da q izprevarqt ot nqsno?!? Posle edin po edin po4vat da se izmykvat ot meleto, ama toj purviq e za boj deto se e zavrql, a ne e minal ot dqsno

[Japanese_fever]

# Under no circumstances should you leave a safe distance between you and the car in front of you no matter how fast you're going. If you do, the space will be filled in by somebody else, putting you in an even more dangerous situation.

# Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to insure that your anti-lock braking system kicks in to give you a nice relaxing foot massage as the brake pedal pulsates.


Zaradi gornite 2 pravila, koito qvno bqha spazeni ot dvamata voda4a(vtoriq ot zad bqh az) biggrin.gif tzunkah edna 6matka otzad. Tumno, mokro, traffic, no distance, razseqn sled rabota, ru4ka ne6to radioto ... Opitah da spra, no ne mi dostignaha 10 sAntima - 4uk i razklatih kakata. V slu4aq az sum 6matkata. Na mojta kola nqma i draskotina. Nejnata Corolla '04 leko odraskana ot bolt4etata mi na nomera. K'vo da pravi6 slu4va se. Kak puk to4no Corolla da frasna. Ama i onazi 6matka sprq mnogo rqzko.

# Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right. It's a good way to scare people entering the highway. - No Comment

Na tiq sopolankovci trqbva ALTEZZA-ta da im predade urok, 4e vinagi se kara v dqsnata lenta kato e svobodna, osven pri izprevarvane. TO tova go pi6a e v knijkata s pravilata za dvijenie, ama koj da 4ete ...
Karaj v lqvata i ne mu misli , kykyvitzi!

[ALTEZZA]

# Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right. It's a good way to scare people entering the highway. - No Comment

Na tiq sopolankovci trqbva ALTEZZA-ta da im predade urok, 4e vinagi se kara v dqsnata lenta kato e svobodna, osven pri izprevarvane. TO tova go pi6a e v knijkata s pravilata za dvijenie, ama koj da 4ete ...
Karaj v lqvata i ne mu misli , kykyvitzi!

da ti kaja chestno izvestno vreme se opitvah da karam taka, t.e. da zadminavam samo ot liavo, i ako ima niakoi da mi prechi v liavata lenta(a to vinagi ima naikoia zaspala shmatka karasta s limita) se zalepvah i pochvah s kasi dalgi, i ako ne se setiat nakraia zadminavah prez avariinoto(nali si e ot liavo), obache stignah do izvoda che shmatkite sa prekaleno mnogo i mi pisna da da si gubia vremeto s tiah, sega zadminavam otkadeto mi padne, hich ne mi i puka.

[ALTEZZA]

# A right lane construction closure is just a game to see how many people can cut in line by passing you on the right as you sit in the left lane waiting for the same jerks to squeeze their way back in before hitting construction barrels.

# Turn signals are just clues as to your next move in road battle, so never use them.

# Under no circumstances should you leave a safe distance between you and the car in front of you no matter how fast you're going. If you do, the space will be filled in by somebody else, putting you in an even more dangerous situation.

# The faster you drive through a red light, the smaller the chance you have of getting hit.

# Never get in the way of a car that needs extensive body work. (Remember no-fault insurance: he might not have much to lose; you do.)

# Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to insure that your anti-lock braking system kicks in to give you a nice relaxing foot massage as the brake pedal pulsates.

# Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right. It's a good way to scare people entering the highway.

# Speed limits are arbitrary figures to make our city look as if it conforms with other state policies; these are given only as suggestions and are readily unenforceable.

# Just because you're in the left lane and have no room to speed up or move over doesn't mean that a driver flashing his high beams behind you doesn't think he can go faster in your spot.
biggrin.gif biggrin.gif

tezi nesta iavno kat sa gi pisali sa me imali vpredvid men, az gi spazvam sichkite edno po edno . nai veche parvoto, to mi e lubimoto

[Japanese_fever]

tezi nesta iavno kat sa gi pisali sa me imali vpredvid men, az gi spazvam sichkite edno po edno . nai veche parvoto, to mi e lubimoto

Puk az si misleh, 4e si primeren voda4?!? Za podrajanie kakto se kazva.
Qvno 4ovek si smenq stila s vremeto i naj-ve4e zavisi ot sredata kudeto kara6! Ako ima mnogo 6matki trqbva da po4va6 da igrae6 s tehnite pravila, ina4e nqma da stigne6 do nikude!
Abe ti mnogo extreme si vzle da go dava6?!? biggrin.gif
Az lqtoto sum se navil da hodq na street racing(illegal razbira se)

I po princip vinagi e hubavo da kara6 v dqsnata lenta(govorq ne za magistrala), za6toto ako si v lqvata i nqkoj re6i da zaviva trqbva ili burzo da mine6 v dqsnata(ako e svobodna) ili da visi6 zad nego dokato toj 4aka!
To tiq deto za vivat nadqsno i te po4ti spirat, no vse pak po4ti!

[ALTEZZA]

e, az vinagi taka sam si karal, daje naposledak go davam po spokoino, daje i skorosta se stremia da ia namalia, stoto mi pisaha edna chestitka, daje tazi sedmica ste hodia na uchiliste po sluchaia. inache za primernoto karane, zavisi v kvo nastroenie sam, pak i poprincip kato vozia niakoi i si govorim togava karam dosta po zaspalo i ne se rachkam iz kolite, osven ako ne barzam za niakade.
ianche po vaprosa s liava i diasna lenta, zavisi kakva e ulicata, tuk iz sabarbanite vinagi ima ostrov mejdu dvete posoki na dvijenie, taka che ako ste zavivash na liavo vinagi se kachvash na ostrova i ne zadrastvash dvijenieto. pak za na diasno kolite se namaliavat i gi chakash, taka che pri takava ulica e po na dalavera da karash liavata lenta. inache iz Chicago karam na zig zag, tam pravila niama ta kak mi doide. ta vinagi sam se chudil dali ulicite sa edna ili dve lenti, to markirovka niama.

[Japanese_fever]

Abe v toq red na misli iskam da razkaja edna istoriq na koqto dvamata s Altezzov bqhme svideteli , zamo 4e az za razlika ot nego bqh v centura na dejstvieto! laugh.gif Tova e edin ot momentite v koito se po4uvstvah, 4e sum vuv film?!?
Zna4i istoriqta e slednata:
Karam po hulmist puten u4astuk tip planinski s po edna lenta vuv vsqka posoka i razbira se neprekusnata dvojna osova liniq. Ta karam az s limita 35-40 m/h i suotvetno zad men se e nasubrala opa6ka ot koli. Mnogo zavoi, mnogo izka4vaniq i spuskaniq. Izvednuj na vurha na edin hulm se pokazva prava otse4ka, koeto e spuskane i sled tova izka4vane, ako ne se luja. Pri purviq vuzmojen udoben moment ot lqvata mi strana profu4ava Suzuki Vitara i sled bukvalno 2-3 sec. ot dqsno po shoudera me izprevarva bqsno(pomislih si, 4e sum sprql i vzeh da sliza ) edno 350Z. Sled o6te nqkolko sekunsi ot lqvo mi minava edin Dodge Neon. Az po4nah da se 6a6kam strah i vdigane na adrenalina zapo4nah da izpitvam. Gledam v ogledaloto za zadno kolite zad men karat na zig-zag i se 4udqt ot kude da me po4nat. Za sekundi(to cqlata scena be6e nqkakvi si sekundi) si pomislih, 4e u4astvam v The Fast and The Furious
Sled cqloto 6ou, koeto napraviha mom4etata az im vijdam zadnicite i razbiram, 4e sa bulgar4eta. Otzad na kolite im BG, Bulgaria i vikam e tiq sa na6i hora biggrin.gif , no dolu v niskoto, ot kude iznikna i az ne mojah da razbera se poqvi edna patrulka i vsi4kite koli, koito bqhme okolo 10-tina i pove4e otbihme v dqsno. Posle produljihme, no tiq dvamata pi4a sus Vitarata i 350Z maj sa otnesli soleni tiketi. Sigurno tiq mo4eta mnogo sa me psuvali posle?!?
Ta v taq sumatoha ALTEZZA-ta mina pokraj men. I az vikam, aha tova e negovata banda biggrin.gif Ob6to me izprevariha 3 ili 4 koli. ALTEZZA-ta ne be6e ot tqh toj kara6e mnogo spokojno i ne pokazva6e na kakvo e sposobna kolata mu, a i samiq toj!

P.S.
Altezzov spomnq6 li si na 2-ri qnuari be6e po putq ot Galena kum Chicago?!?

[ALTEZZA]

az tozi sluchai mnogo dobre go pomnia, no ne znaeh che i ti si bil tam . inache nie biahme kolona ot 10tina koli i se sledvahme i saotveno izprevarvahme na koi ot kade mu padne, no az gledah da karam spokoino, stoto dva dena predi tova mi pisaha ticket za previshena skorost. ta teia det te zadminaha ednata kola beshe Geo Tracker, inache drugata verno beshe Nissan 350, predpolagam che i Mazda 6 i Scion tC sasto sa te zadminali, te pone men me zadminaha, no az im dadoh pat karaiki po avariinoto. chengeto det beshe dolu obache vidia samo Geo-to i Z-to, ta samo tiah gi nagradi, no te se otarvaha mnogo leko, dade im ticketi samo za nepravilno zadminavane($75). a i chengeto chakashe dolo pod halma stoto mu se biaha obadili nedovolni shofiori det veche biaha zadminati ot nas . btw, na men sluchkata po skoro mi napomniashe na Gumball3000, ako si go gledal.

[jamie]

Altezzov и неговата банда ;-))
Ах хулигани с хулигани !

[PAKETA_1]

A pak Lorda karashe pred men shtoto takmo biah smachkal SUBARU-to otpred i niamashe farove... nai iakoto beshe che okolo 6 ot kolite imahme radiostancii i se predoprejdavahme po tiah i kreshtiahme...

[Japanese_fever]

A pak Lorda karashe pred men shtoto takmo biah smachkal SUBARU-to otpred i niamashe farove... nai iakoto beshe che okolo 6 ot kolite imahme radiostancii i se predoprejdavahme po tiah i kreshtiahme...

Sega kato kaza se setih, 4e vidqh radiostanciite i tova me upla6i dopulnitelno! laugh.gif Vikam si, abe tiq da ne sa nqkoi magistralni banditi?!?
Az o6te togava razbrah, 4e ste grupa ot 10-tina 4oveka. To i slepec 6te6e da razbere, he-he biggrin.gif
Sled kato policaq sprq dvama ot geroite, drugite produljihte do edna benzinostanciq i sprqhte tam da gi iz4akate. Az se 4udeh dali da se obadq na Altezzov, ama ne bqh sam i gledahme da se priberem po-burzo. Ina4e mu se obadih vednaga na ALTEZZA-ta na sell phona i mu ostavih suob6tenie da izkaja vuzhi6tenieto si i da mu 4estitq novata godina, nali be6e 2-ri, no toj ne znam dali go e polu4il, za6toto obhvata be6e lo6 v onzi rajon?!?